As of right now the sound of your voice are similar to the Swedish band Pain but for some reason the first thing that came to mind was Black Sabbath with Ozzy. I'm not trying to be rude when I say this, but overall, even with different lyrics, this song is really repetitive. I skipped around it after giving it one full good listen and it all sounds the same.
You should keep trying though, this is better than I can do and like I said, your voice could be really cool if you use it right.